FUR COATS AND FISH SPAS

Kimon the Chef contemplating Chateau Crozier sometime in the future ..

There are many things that are difficult to comprehend about living in Crete (or anywhere else it seems). At the moment, we are all holding our breath to see what the second round of elections – due to take place on 17 June – will throw up. Nobody knows whether Greece will be maintaining or walking away from the beleaguered Euro. The results will probably be hard either way and I guess everyone, whether politician or not, finds themselves between a rock and a hard place looking madly for a life preserver.

Meanwhile, the growing season carries on much as normal in our village. The gifts of melons, cucumbers, tomatoes and horta (wild greens – a bit like spinach) carry on in their own unchanging order. Mr Raucous fish van with his horrible megaphone even gave K a bag of fish the other night. The cacophony was so deafening, while we were trying to listen to a radio play, that K went down in high dudgeon to ask if he could turn the noise down. Mr R F V had left the megaphone blasting while stopping off for half an hour inside the cafeneon for his coffee.  Meanwhile, we were going crazy. 'Stop and have a coffee', he said 'and have a bag of fish – they won't keep and what am I going to do with them?' As we had eaten already, the last thing we wanted was a bag of fish, but he would not take No for an answer and our neighbours on either side were delighted to have half each (and we returned the favour of the bag of horta from the previous day). Somehow honour had been satisfied without a penny being spent. Oh that the problems with the Euro could be solved so simply! The nice thing about barter is that nothing is wasted, but you end up eating all sorts of meals you never planned for.

Birthday fun included lots of references to fishing and kayaking!

Fishing boat and fisherman from K's wonderful cake

The one meal we had planned for this week was K's birthday and we ate at the weekly barbecue held at Camping Elizabeth. Here is a place of sanity where nothing essential has changed since the 1960s and the grounds have been designated a preservation area of natural beach and sand dunes whilst to the left and the right large concrete hotels have been allowed to swallow up too much of the Rethymnon coast. Thank heavens there is one area of the beach where turtles can safely lay their eggs and peace and quiet prevails among the bamboo and tamarisk canopy. Kind friends had made his day special by baking a brilliant birthday cake (which sadly got eaten before we could take a photo) and coffee and cupcakes at our favourite coffee shop in Panormo.

Vinzi's Coffee Shop high on the Battlements in Panormo

The drive to the campsite took us through a number of resorts with the hideous profusion of crowded souvenir shops, supermarkets and bars. The hapless motorist needs to negotiate clumps of tourists, trucks and bewildering motor bikes and scooters whizzing towards the car from all directions. It is not for the faint-hearted.

Most people we know are mystified by the large number of Russian Fur Coat shops that have sprung up in Crete along the coastal resorts. Nobody would think of Crete as being the first place on earth that anyone would be likely to need a fur coat, so their growing order of importance and opulent modern showroom buildings are a bit of a puzzle. However as there are masses of Russian tourists in our local resorts at the moment, we can only suppose that Russians are now able to buy furs and take them back home with them?? If there are any rich Athenians left, they may make such a purchase as essential holiday shopping ?? Certainly, the Cretans do not have the anti hunting, anti fur lobby which exists in the rest of Europe – so perhaps this is one of the few places where they can be put on sale ?? We are open for comments and any further inspiration on this subject would be welcome.

Kayaking on Tuesday

Similarly, we are agog to see dozens and dozens of Fish Spa premises in the big towns and wonder if the world has gone a bit crazy. With a beautiful clear, turquoise sea right on hand for paddling and swimming, who in their right mind would want to pay good money to dunk their feet in tanks of water previously occupied by other hot, sweaty feet belonging to souvlaki-eating tourists and a handful of unfortunate fish while crowds amble past gawping (or similarly mystified)? Every time we visit Rethymnon another couple of establishments have opened and we cannot believe that anyone can make a living this way. Full marks for trying though and having a go.

Keeping up with the news we read or see on line is like being swept up in a bizarre dream about The Emperor’s New Clothes where none of the arithmetic adds up. There are so many questions such as Bankers' Bonuses, the value of Advertising budgets, Football Players' Pay, Television programmes, Nations living on endless credit which is based on … yes, well nothing, that I can get a grasp of … and now Fur Coat Showrooms in Crete and wall-to-wall Fish Spas... Is it just me or has the world in general lost the plot?

Ever a fan of the Goons, Kimon quotes Spike Milligan when it comes to plotting the future ..., 

Spike said: “If nothing is planned, nothing can go wrong.”

As few things 'go' without Faith and Trust; my viewpoint is a bit different, but that is another discussion entirely.

KALOMINA!